Not just any haircut

Anniversaries are upon us, and many have nothing to do with weddings.

A couple weeks ago, I saw a young man I know. Call him Mike. He is handsomely cute, funny, and remarkably insightful.  This 20-something “kid” (my words) is also blessed with an envious amount of shiny, wavy hair which is the color of a rich cup of French Roast coffee.

I hadn’t seen Mike for a few months. So when I did, I noticed that his hair was much longer than usual. Polite person that I try to be, I didn’t mention it. Lots of young men wear their hair long these days, don’t they? I figured he was just experimenting with a new look.

He’s not. Mike is planning to have a friend shave his gorgeous hair completely off.

“You are?” I asked. “Why? Your hair is perfect!”

Then he explained.  One day last June, Mike got home from work, flipped on his TV and flopped on his couch to watch Jeopardy like he always did. A few minutes after sitting down, he felt a crack inside his head. As the TV show progressed, Mike felt “not right” but also thought the feeling would pass. Instead, he passed out. When he came to, a different TV show was on. Still not knowing what was happening to him, Mike groped around for his cell phone, found it and called 911.

Mike saved his own life with that 911 call because he had ruptured a brain aneurysm. Obviously, he survived his surgery and long stint in ICU. Today, he works, drives, and enjoys spending time with his family and friends. He even has a significant relationship with a young woman now!

Mike admits that he just wants to get on with his life. But he also admits that each day brings reminders of what happened to him. He loves driving but is much more exhausted once he gets to his destination. He needs to seek a few minutes of alone time during parties with friends. He sometimes feels frustrated with jobs that require an excess of multi-tasking. Most annoyingly, he can’t always laugh off occasional forgetfulness, even though every human being forgets things once in awhile. Face it, when friends or family forget something, they shrug and say, “I’m showing my age, I guess.” When a brain aneurysm survivor forgets something, we pause and think, “Is it happening again? Am I okay?”

We look the same as before our aneurysms ruptured. We have the same interests, activities and personalities.  But we are different, too.  And it’s all too easy to forget that.

Mike is approaching his one-year anniversary with mixed feelings. In the spirit of youth, however, he decided to grow out his hair and shave it all off on his anniversary date.

“I haven’t seen my scar in months,” he said. “My friends haven’t, either. So I thought it would be good way to celebrate living and, at the same time, remind myself and everyone else what happened.”

I laughed.  What a great idea! It makes a lot of sense. My own anniversary is approaching (three years). Is it time for me to shave my head? Maybe not yet. I think I’ll go to a movie instead.